The curse of delay.

This whole saga starts with my birth. Okay I've like told this story so many times to my friends in an attempt to make them understand that its done to death. So well I'll try and say it differently here...

When I was to be born, the docs told my Mum that I'd arrive on 4th Jan 1983. Turns out the stork carrying me decided to take a detour. That darn stork was probably high on something... it shoudn't have been on the job in the first place. I've never known a more distracted creature in my whole life. So well Mr. Stork had its little adventure (I'm assuming it was male cos only a guy can be capable of being that careless!) and then realsing he had a job to do rushed off to deliver me to Mulund to my eager parents. We (or rather I) arrived on 11th Jan 1983. And well since then things just keep getting worse.

Until the time I was in school, my time management was someone else's business so things were okay. But then I went to junior college and my poor parents were deluded enough to think I would be responsible.

Well it started with tiny things - wake up late and a lil late to class, sometimes even for an exam. I knew I was flirting with trouble but I never imagined things could get much worse. I didn't know what 'worse' could be..

Good thing 'bout junior college was that they had rules fit for a military school ~makes a dirty face~ So even though I did get into trouble it was never anything drastic. But then I came to BMM. The rules were a bit more relaxed and I started to get careless - with my time and with other people's time.

Although I never used to be that late for class, when it came to plans with friends it was well a DISASTER!!!

I remember one time I had to go to a friends place and I got there TWO HOURS LATE!!! It wasn't intentional. It never is. I mean I've not completely lost my mind that I'd turn up late for an interview or a date... But I do... almost always. It seems like time has lost its hold over me, Or maybe I've lost all sense of time.

Mostly, actually almost always it happens so that I do leave home on time and stuff but then something unavoidable happens and I still get late. Its like the whole darn universe is conspiring against me and making sure that this curse doesn't leave me.

I know of times when I walk in late for movies. Lols (thats a cynical laugh, I'm not enjoying myself!) Concerts, Mass, parties, periods, work... Nothing is spared!

Funny thing is I have a couple of friends who are very good at time management. Even my Ex, he had many faults but impuntuality wasn't one of them. Inspite of all these people in my life I haven't been able to change. But trust me I'm trying. So all I ask for is a little patience... and help!

I'm an Angel... Not.

We all seek perferction, even though we know all too well that no one is perfect. The fact is that it is our imperfections that makes us interesting. And these are the very imperfections that makes us yearn for the perfect... For some reason we search for perfection... especially in other people. We seek angels. I think we do so to hide from our demons. I think we look for that perfect somebody in the wasteful hope that probably their perfection may rub of on us and give us some meaning to our existence.

I, like every other mortal, am guilty of this crime. And frankly I'm yet to meet somebody who hasnt defecated on my illusions of perfection... I'm reading Anne Rice now, I guess my choice of words show that. Lols.

Why can't we just let people be? Its always the same story. You meet someone new and your mind goes into over-drive building what they are- actually what you want them to be. You make them into angels who could do no harm. They are perfect, heavenly beings with radiant sunshine smiles, halo and wings et al. When your around them there's happy music playing in your head. You feel like yelling out loud, "I believe in fairies! I do! I do!" You wanna dance all the time. You have a toothy, goofy grin pasted on your face at all times. Geez what the fuck am i describing? Illusions? Love? Or Drugs??? Figure that out yourself!!! hahaha...

... And then after all this song and dance the inevitable happens. Some one dumps cold water on your head (or down your pants, depends on how you look at it) and you find yourself flat on the pavement. Dazed and confused. And you realise that just like you, they are human and full of flaws. Sometimes your forgive them for their shortcomings, sometimes you dont. Well actually you are the one to blame. But its so much more easier to blame some one else, isn't it?

But inspite of all this your back on square one when you meet someone new... and its the same story all over again.

This whole thing reminds me of this episode of FRIENDS, where Monica and Pheobe meet this cute guy on the street and Monica whistles at him to catch his attention. The guy gets distracted and gets hit by a bus! He lands up in a coma and they visit him daily at the hospital. They imagine what kinda guy he is (or rather what they want him to be) He wakes up and he's not what they made him out to be.

Hmm guess we'd all be amazing people too - as long as we'd be in a coma! ~smirks~